Saturday, January 11, 2014

Creepypasta Reviews: Jeff the Killer

Creepypasta Reviews: Jeff the Killer

Welcome to the first of what I hope to be many reviews of Creepypasta. As an avid reader of horror I’ve come across a number of great stories online, some so effective that I would stay awake at night for fear of having nightmares. Or course, with the good comes the bad and that’s what the focus of these reviews will be. I intend to make sure that the story’s I pick are either well known or at the very least show potential. After all, if it were simply a matter of ragging on bad creepypasta, I could just go to Crappypasta.com.

So, Jeff the Killer. I’ll be honest, this is the very first creepypasta that I came across. At the time I enjoyed it, though I didn’t actually read it. I had listened to MrCreepyPasta read it and to be perfectly honest, I think that was the only factor that made me enjoy the story. After all, MrCreepyPasta has a unique ability to draw people into the stories he reads, regardless of quality. So, let’s take a look at it to see how well it holds up.

Excerpt from a local Newspaper:
OMINOUS UNKNOWN KILLER IS STILL AT LARGE.’


After weeks of unexplained murders, the ominous unknown killer is still on the rise. After little evidence has been found, a young boy states that he survived one of the killer’s attacks and bravely tells his story.


Before we go any further, I’d like to give a word of advice to anyone who decides to try doing this. The idea of this coming from a “local” newspaper is to subconsciously unnerve the reader. It implies that what happened in the story could potentially affect them. Granted, it’s not as descriptive as one would expect a newspaper to be, as it would at the very least mention that victim didn’t want to give his name for safety’s sake. I’d give credit to the writer for doing something right, though he quickly kills the momentum as soon as the kid actually starts talking.


I had a bad dream and I woke up in the middle of the night,” says the boy, “I saw that for some reason the window was open, even though I remember it being closed before I went to bed. I got up and shut it once more. Afterwards, I simply crawled under my covers and tried to get back to sleep. That’s when I had a strange feeling, like someone was watching me. I looked up, and nearly jumped out of my bed. There, in the little ray of light, illuminating from between my curtains, were a pair of two eyes. These weren’t regular eyes; they were dark, ominous eyes. They were bordered in black and… just plain out terrified me. That’s when I saw his mouth. A long, horrendous smile that made every hair on my body stand up. The figure stood there, watching me. Finally, after what seemed like forever, he said it. A simple phrase, but said in a way only a mad man could speak.


I feel inclined to ask: how old is this kid? The newspaper excerpt doesn’t exactly clue us in to how old he might be. I ask because I don’t know many “boys” who talk like this. This is a problem that some people have when it comes to writing dialogue. There’s a distinct difference between something someone would write and something that they’d say out loud. This is presented as an interview, but it’s too descriptive and it seems like the kid is making an effort to try and make what happened to him sound menacing. I can see a teenager writing this as a journal entry of some sort but I can imagine that a kid, who was recently attacked by a serial killer mind you, would go out of his way to be as descriptive as possible.


He said, ‘Go To Sleep.’ I let out a scream, that’s what sent him at me. He pulled up a knife; aiming at my heart. He jumped on top of my bed. I fought him back; I kicked, I punched, I rolled around, trying to knock him off me. That’s when my dad busted in. The man threw the knife, it went into my dad’s shoulder. The man probably would’ve finished him off, if one of the neighbors hadn’t alerted the police.


I’m assuming that their neighbors saw Jeff entering the house beforehand, because I find it pretty hard to believe that police would’ve come that damn quick after they heard a scream next door. Not unless Jeff was so stupid as to try and kills someone who lived across the street from the local police station.


They drove into the parking lot, and ran towards the door. The man turned and ran down the hallway. I heard a smash, like glass breaking. As I came out of my room, I saw the window that was pointing towards the back of my house was broken. I looked out it to see him vanish into the distance. I can tell you one thing, I will never forget that face. Those cold, evil eyes, and that psychotic smile. They will never leave my head.”
Police are still on the look for this man. If you see anyone that fits the description in this story, please contact your local police department.







I somehow doubt he’s hard to miss.


Jeff and his family had just moved into a new neighborhood. His dad had gotten a promotion at work, and they thought it would be best to live in one of those “fancy” neighborhoods. Jeff and his brother Liu couldn’t complain though. A new, better house. What was not to love? As they were getting unpacked, one of their neighbors came by.


Not a very good transition into the perspective change, is it? Not even a border that separates this from the newspapers part of the story.
Hello,” she said, “I’m Barbara; I live across the street from you. Well, I just wanted to introduce my self and to introduce my son.” She turns around and calls her son over. “Billy, these are our new neighbors.” Billy said hi and ran back to play in his yard.


Despite what I said about the newspaper excerpt, it was decently written in its own right. There are noticeable declines in descriptions in this story, this being one of them. The way it’s written makes it seem as though the author wanted to rush past the parts he didn’t care about so he can get to the “good” parts.


Well,” said Jeff’s mom, “I’m Margaret, and this is my husband Peter, and my two sons, Jeff and Liu.” They each introduced themselves, and then Barbara invited them to her son’s birthday. Jeff and his brother were about to object, when their mother said that they would love to. When Jeff and his family are done packing, Jeff went up to his mom.
Mom, why would you invite us to some kid’s party? If you haven’t noticed, I’m not some dumb kid.”
Oh, quit your bitching kid, you’re barely a preteen!


Jeff,” said his mother, “We just moved here; we should show that we want to spend time with our neighbors. Now, we’re going to that party, and that’s final.” Jeff started to talk, but stopped himself, knowing that he couldn’t do anything. Whenever his mom said something, it was final. He walked up to his room and plopped down on his bed. He sat there looking at his ceiling when suddenly, he got a weird feeling. Not so much a pain, but… a weird feeling. He dismissed it as just some random feeling. He heard his mother call him down to get his stuff, and he walked down to get it.


And here we come to another problem with this story. The way that this story presents Jeff’s desire to hurt people makes it come off as something that he just started feeling. Maybe it’s just me, but I got the impression that there was some kind of external force that was driving him to feel this way. If it was said that Jeff sometimes feels this way when angry or upset, it would better give the impression that something may be wrong with him. Perhaps even give hints that Jeff had incidents when the feeling got the better of him and he hurt someone.


The next day, Jeff walked down stairs to get breakfast and got ready for school. As he sat there, eating his breakfast, he once again got that feeling. This time it was stronger. It gave him a slight tugging pain, but he once again dismissed it. As he and Liu finished breakfast, they walked down to the bus stop. They sat there waiting for the bus, and then, all of a sudden, some kid on a skateboard jumped over them, only inches above their laps. They both jumped back in surprise. “Hey, what the hell?”


Soooo, he just feels it randomly while eating breakfast? It made a bit of sense before when he was upset with his mother, but here? This kind of implies that Jeff would’ve eventually became a killer on his own.


The kid landed and turned back to them. He kicked his skate board up and caught it with his hands. The kid seems to be about twelve; one year younger than Jeff. He wears a Aeropostale shirt and ripped blue jeans.


I can’t help but notice that this is first time that only some characters are given physical descriptions. Not complaining, but a bit of consistency would be nice.




Well, well, well. It looks like we got some new meat.” Suddenly, two other kids appeared. One was super skinny and the other was huge. “Well, since you’re new here, I’d like to introduce ourselves, over there is Keith.” Jeff and Liu looked over to the skinny kid. He had a dopey face that you would expect a sidekick to have. “And he’s Troy.” They looked over at the fat kid. Talk about a tub of lard. This kid looked like he hadn’t exercised since he was crawling.


Oh, I’m sorry, I called them characters. I meant to say caricatures.


And I,” said the first kid, “am Randy. Now, for all the kids in this neighborhood there is a small price for bus fare, if you catch my drift.” Liu stood up, ready to punch the lights out of the kid’s eyes when one of his friends pulled a knife on him. “Tsk, tsk, tsk, I had hoped you would be more cooperative, but it seems we must do this the hard way.” The kid walked up to Liu and took his wallet out of his pocket. Jeff got that feeling again. Now, it was truly strong; a burning sensation. He stood up, but Liu gestured him to sit down. Jeff ignored him and walked up to the kid.


Word of advice: if truly feel it necessary to have bully characters in your story, actually have them talk like people. This guy sounds like something a nineties movie.


Listen here you little punk, give back my bro’s wallet or else.” Randy put the wallet in his pocket and pulled out his own knife.
Oh? And what will you do?” Just as he finished the sentence, Jeff popped the kid in the nose. As Randy reached for his face, Jeff grabbed the kid’s wrist and broke it. Randy screamed and Jeff grabbed the knife from his hand. Troy and Keith rushed Jeff, but Jeff was too quick. He threw Randy to the ground. Keith lashed out at him, but Jeff ducked and stabbed him in the arm. Keith dropped his knife and fell to the ground screaming. Troy rushd him too, but Jeff didn’t even need the knife. He just punched Troy straight in the stomach and Troy went down. As he fell, he puked all over. Liu could do nothing but look in amazement at Jeff.


Again, this sort of comes out of nowhere. We don’t really know who Jeff is as a character, so we can’t fully grasp why this is apparently a big deal. His brother was amazed that Jeff could actually fight, but what does that mean for us as the reader? At no point did we given signs that Jeff was passive or nonviolent person, so we can’t really tell if this is out of character for him.


Jeff how’d you?” that was all he said. They saw the bus coming and knew they’d be blamed for the whole thing.


... Why? Why would they be blame for it? They could’ve easily explained to the bus driver that Randy and his crew were trying to mug them and they defended themselves. Randy mentioned that all kids paid his “toll”, so it’s very likely that he’s threatened and mugged people before. Later on we’ll see that they have no reservations for committing crimes in plain view, so the chances of them simply putting on an innocent face in front of adults are unlikely. I don’t know, it seems like a lot of issues that come later in the story could’ve easily been avoided using common sense.


So they started running as fast as they could. As they ran, they looked back and saw the bus driver rushing over to Randy and the others. As Jeff and Liu made it to school, they didn’t dare tell what happened. All they did was sit and listen. Liu just thought of that as his brother beating up a few kids, but Jeff knew it was more. It was something, scary. As he got that feeling he felt how powerful it was, the urge to just, hurt someone. He didn’t like how it sounded, but he couldn’t help feeling happy. He felt that strange feeling go away, and stay away for the entire day of school. Even as he walked home due to the whole thing near the bus stop, and how now he probably wouldn’t be taking the bus anymore, he felt happy. When he got home his parents asked him how his day was, and he said, in a somewhat ominous voice, “It was a wonderful day.” Next morning, he heard a knock at his front door. He walked down to find two police officers at the door, his mother looking back at him with an angry look.
Jeff, these officers tell me that you attacked three kids. That it wasn’t regular fighting, and that they were stabbed. Stabbed, son!” Jeff’s gaze fell to the floor, showing his mother that it was true.
Mom, they were the ones who pulled the knives on me and Liu.”


Which you could’ve easily explained to the bus driver. Too late now.


Son,” said one of the cops,” We found three kids, two stabbed, one having a bruise on his stomach, and we have witnesses proving that you fled the scene. Now, what does that tell us?” Jeff knew it was no use. He could say him and Liu had been attacked, but then there was no proof it was not them who attacked first.


Double negatives are fun, aren’t they? By the way, take note of all the times the cop says “son”.


They couldn’t say that they weren’t fleeing, because truth be told they were. So Jeff couldn’t defend himself or Liu.
Son, call down your brother.” Jeff couldn’t do it, since it was him who beat up all the kids.
Sir, it…it was me. I was the one who beat up the kids. Liu tried to hold me back, but he couldn’t stop me.” The cop looked at his partner and they both nod.
Well kid, looks like a year in Juvy…”
Wait!” says Liu. They all looked up to see him holding a knife. The officers pulled their guns and locked them on Liu.


A little fucking extreme to pull out guns on a ten year old, don’t you think?
It was me, I beat up those little punks.


What do you mean “little”? They were older and bigger than you!


Have the marks to prove it.” He lifted up his sleeves to reveal cuts and bruises, as if he was in a struggle.


Where those self-inflicted? I’m pretty sure nothing actually happened to Liu. If they were, then did he really punch himself in the arm enough times to leave bruises? Plus, wouldn’t the cops be able to tell that they there self-inflicted?


Son, just put the knife down,” said the officer. Liu held up the knife and dropped it to the ground. He put his hands up and walked over to the cops.
No Liu, it was me! I did it!” Jeff had tears running down his face.
Huh, poor bro. Trying to take the blame for what I did. Well, take me away.” The police led Liu out to the patrol car.
Liu, tell them it was me! Tell them! I was the one who beat up those kids!” Jeff’s mother put her hands on his shoulders.
Jeff please, you don’t have to lie. We know it’s Liu, you can stop.” Jeff watched helplessly as the cop car speeds off with Liu inside. A few minutes later Jeff’s dad pulled into the driveway, seeing Jeff’s face and knowing something was wrong.


You know what would’ve been go to see throughout the story? Interactions between Jeff and Liu. I have no emotional connection to Jeff and his plight, because they never established what kind of relationship they had. Again, to get the reader drawn in what’s happening you have to actually give us a reason to care. For all I know, Liu hated his brother and purposely let himself go to juvy to be away from him!


Son, son what is it?” Jeff couldn’t answer. His vocal cords were strained from crying. Instead, Jeff’s mother walked his father inside to break the bad news to him as Jeff wept in the driveway. After an hour or so Jeff walked back in to the house, seeing that his parents were both shocked, sad, and disappointed. He couldn’t look at them. He couldn’t see how they thought of Liu when it was his fault. He just went to sleep, trying to get the whole thing off his mind. Two days went by, with no word from Liu at JDC. No friends to hang out with. Nothing but sadness and guilt. That is until Saturday, when Jeff is woke up by his mother, with a happy, sunshiny face.
Jeff, it’s the day.” she said as she opened up the curtains and let light flood into his room.


I forgot to mention, the writer is constantly switching from past to present tense. You’d think that’s something that you’d notice when editing a story.


What, what’s today?” asked Jeff as he stirs awake.


Stirs awake? Stir already means to wake up. Redundancy much?


Why, it’s Billy’s party.” He was now fully awake.
Mom, you’re joking, right? You don’t expect me to go to some kid’s party after…” There was a long pause.
Jeff, we both know what happened. I think this party could be the thing that brightens up the past days. Now, get dressed.” Jeff’s mother walked out of the room and downstairs to get ready herself. He fought himself to get up. He picked out a random shirt and pair of jeans and walked down stairs. He saw his mother and father all dressed up; his mother in a dress and his father in a suit. He thought, why they would ever wear such fancy clothes to a kid’s party?
Son, is that all your going to wear?” said Jeff’s mom.


You’re*… and yes, that is something that I will always correct because it’s a pet peeve of mind.


Better than wearing too much.” he said. His mother pushed down the feeling to yell at him and hid it with a smile.
Now Jeff, we may be over-dressed, but this is how you go if you want to make an impression.” said his father. Jeff grunted and went back up to his room.


Just an impression? Not a good impression? Well, if that’s the case then just go over and take a shit on their lawn. They definitely remember it!


I don’t have any fancy clothes!” he yelled down stairs.
Just pick out something.” called his mother. He looked around in his closet for what he would call fancy. He found a pair of black dress pants he had for special occasions and an undershirt. He couldn’t find a shirt to go with it though. He looked around, and found only striped and patterned shirts. None of which go with dress pants. Finally he found a white hoodie and put it on.
You’re wearing that?” they both said. His mother looked at her watch. “Oh, no time to change. Let’s just go.” She said as she herded Jeff and his father out the door. They crossed the street over to Barbara and Billy’s house. They knocked on the door and at it appeared that Barbara, just like his parents, way over-dressed. As they walked inside all Jeff could see were adults, no kids.
The kids are out in the yard. Jeff, how about you go and meet some of them?” said Barbara.
Jeff walked outside to a yard full of kids. They were running around in weird cowboy costumes and shooting each other with plastic guns. He might as well be standing in a Toys R Us. Suddenly a kid came up to him and handed him a toy gun and hat.


What that a metaphor for the amount of kids or the toys? I can’t really tell.


Hey. Wanna pway?” he said.


Something about this makes me want to punch something… can’t actually say why. I guess I’m use to writers children to make us feel bad when some shit goes down. I’ll admit, it could just be me.


Ah, no kid. I’m way too old for this stuff.” The kid looked at him with that weird puppydog face.
Pwease?” said the kid. “Fine,” said Jeff. He put on the hat and started to pretend shoot at the kids. At first he thought it was totally ridiculous, but then he started to actually have fun. It might not have been super cool, but it was the first time he had done something that took his mind off of Liu. So he played with the kids for a while, until he heard a noise. A weird rolling noise. Then it hit him. Randy, Troy, and Keith all jumped over the fence on their skateboards. Jeff dropped the fake gun and ripped off the hat. Randy looked at Jeff with a burning hatred.


Keep in mind, one of them is apparently obese. So, how the hell did HE get over the fence?


Hello, Jeff, is it?” he said. “We have some unfinished business.” Jeff saw his bruised nose.” I think we’re even. I beat the crap out of you, and you get my brother sent to JDC.”


Actually, that was kind of your fault. If you didn’t run, you could’ve simply explained what happened to the bus driver. I hate to be on the bully’s side, but I’m not sympathetic to stupid people.


Randy got an angry look in his eyes. “Oh no, I don’t go for even, I go for winning. You may have kicked our asses that one day, but not today.” As he said that Randy rushed at Jeff. They both fell to the ground. Randy punched Jeff in the nose, and Jeff grabbed him by the ears and head butted him. Jeff pushed Randy off of him and both rose to their feet. Kids were screaming and parents were running out of the house. Troy and Keith both pulled guns out of their pockets.


What the serious fuck? Where did twelve year olds get guns? Isn’t this suppose to be a nice neighborhood? And I don’t know about you, but if someone two little shit heads where waving guns around my child, I’d do something about


No one interrupts or guts will fly!” they said. Randy pulled a knife on Jeff and stabbed it into his shoulder.


And once again I have to stress, if they’re this damn willing to cause trouble in public, how the fuck did they never get caught? Why would they guarantee getting arrested just to beat up this one kid? This is almost as bad as the bully in Pet Semetary 2… oddly enough, the main character he was pointlessly bullying was named Jeff. Go figure.


Jeff screamed and fell to his knees. Randy started kicking him in the face. After three kicks Jeff grabs his foot and twists it, causing Randy to fall to the ground. Jeff stood up and walked towards the back door. Troy grabbed him.
Need some help?” He picks Jeff up by the back of the collar and throws him through the patio door. As Jeff tries to stand he is kicked down to the ground. Randy repeatedly starts kicking Jeff, until he starts to cough up blood.
Come on Jeff, fight me!” He picks Jeff up and throws him into the kitchen. Randy sees a bottle of vodka on the counter and smashes the glass over Jeff’s head.


I would feel it’s necessary to point out that this “epic battle” taking place is between and twelve year old and an eleven year old. Let that fact sink in.


Fight!” He throws Jeff back into the living room.
Come on Jeff, look at me!” Jeff glances up, his face riddled with blood. “I was the one who got your brother sent to JDC! And now you’re just gonna sit here and let him rot in there for a whole year! You should be ashamed!” Jeff starts to get up.


And how will kicking your ass get his brother out of juvy?


Oh, finally! you stand and fight!” Jeff is now to his feet, blood and vodka on his face. Once again he gets that strange feeling, the one in which he hasn’t felt for a while.


It’s only been three days since he last felt it!


Finally. He’s up!” says Randy as he runs at Jeff. That’s when it happens. Something inside Jeff snaps. His psyche is destroyed, all rational thinking is gone, all he can do, is kill. He grabs Randy and pile drives him to the ground.


Jeff pile drived him? That’s not exactly an easy thing to do.


He gets on top of him and punches him straight in the heart. The punch causes Randy’s heart to stop. As Randy gasps for breath. Jeff hammers down on him. Punch after punch, blood gushes from Randy’s body, until he takes one final breath, and dies.


He’s a scrawny eleven year old boy! Yeah, you can hit someone hard enough in the chest to momentarily make their heart stop, but I somehow doubt he could manage it! And blood gushed from his body? From being punched in the face? Is every orifice on his body exerting blood? Chose your words better!


Everyone is looking at Jeff now. The parents, the crying kids, even Troy and Keith. Although they easily break from their gaze and point their guns at Jeff. Jeff see’s the guns trained on him and runs for the stairs. As he runs Troy and Keith let out fire on him, each shot missing. Jeff runs up the stairs. He hears Troy and Keith follow up behind. As they let out their final rounds of bullets Jeff ducks into the bathroom. He grabs the towel rack and rips it off the wall. Troy and Keith race in, knives ready.


Troy swings his knife at Jeff, who backs away and bangs the towel rack into Troy’s face. Troy goes down hard and now all that’s left is Keith. He is more agile than Troy though, and ducks when Jeff swings the towel rack. He dropped the knife and grabbed Jeff by the neck. He pushed him into the wall. A thing of bleach fell down on top of him from the top shelf. It burnt both of them and they both started to scream.


Gee, I didn’t know I could get bleach in a “thing”. How much does a “thing” hold? Must be industrial stuff too if it burns the skin of contact.


Jeff wiped his eyes as best as he could. He pulled back the towel rack and swung it straight into Keith’s head. As he lay there, bleeding to death, he let out an ominous smile.
I think the writer heard the word “ominous” before writing this story and found it so esthetically pleasing to his ears that he decided to use it anywhere he could here.


What’s so funny?” asked Jeff. Keith pulled out a lighter and switched it on. “What’s funny,” he said, “Is that you’re covered in bleach and alcohol.” Jeff’s eyes widened as Keith threw the lighter at him. As soon as the flame made contact with him, the flames ignited the alcohol in the vodka. While the alcohol burned him, the bleach bleached his skin. Jeff let out a terrible screech as he caught on fire. He tried to roll out the fire but it was no use, the alcohol had made him a walking inferno. He ran down the hall, and fell down the stairs. Everybody started screaming as they saw Jeff, now a man on fire, drop to the ground, nearly dead.


One bottle of vodka, smashed over the head, wouldn’t be enough, to set the his whole body, on fire… quit with the excess commas!


The last thing Jeff saw was his mother and the other parents trying to extinguish the flame. That’s when he passed out.
When Jeff woke he had a cast wrapped around his face. He couldn’t see anything, but he felt a cast on his shoulder, and stitches all over his body. He tried to stand up, but he realized that there was some tube in his arm, and when he tried to get up it fell out, and a nurse rushed in.
I don’t think you can get out of bed just yet.” she said as she put him back in his bed and re-inserted the tube. Jeff sat there, with no vision, no idea of what his surroundings were. Finally, after hours, he heard his mother.
Honey, are you okay?” she asked. Jeff couldn’t answer though, his face was covered, and he was unable to speak. “Oh honey, I have great news. After all the witnesses told the police that Randy confessed of trying to attack you, they decided to let Liu go.” This made Jeff almost bolt up, stopping halfway, remembering the tube coming out of his arm. “He’ll be out by tomorrow, and then you two will be able to be together again.”


Okay… I get that his mother’s trying to give him some positive news to try and make him feel a bit better about what happen, but the way it’s written, she comes across as an airheaded ditz who doesn’t give a damn that her son is in the hospital with burns on his face. Look at the way she fraised that. She just glossed over the fact that Jeff was attacked so she could mention that Liu was coming home.


Jeff’s mother hugs Jeff and says her goodbyes. The next couple of weeks were those where Jeff was visited by his family. Then came the day where his bandages were to be removed. His family were all there to see it, what he would look like. As the doctors unwrapped the bandages from Jeff’s face everyone was on the edge of their seats. They waited until the last bandage holding the cover over his face was almost removed.
Let’s hope for the best,” said the doctor. He quickly pulls the cloth; letting the rest fall from Jeff’s face.
Jeff’s mother screams at the sight of his face. Liu and Jeff’s dad stare awe-struck at his face.
What? What happened to my face?” Jeff said. He rushed out of bed and ran to the bathroom. He looked in the mirror and saw the cause of the distress. His face. It…it’s horrible. His lips were burnt to a deep shade of red. His face was turned into a pure white color, and his hair singed from brown to black. He slowly put his hand to his face. It had a sort of leathery feel to it now. He looked back at his family then back at the mirror.


Explain to me how his hair wasn’t just burned off. That typically happens when your hair’s fucking burning. Not to mention, where’s the nurse to keep him restrained so he doesn’t potentially flip out?


Jeff,” said Liu, “It’s not that bad….”
Not that bad?” said Jeff,” It’s perfect!” His family were equally surprised. Jeff started laughing uncontrollably His parents noticed that his left eye and hand were twitching.
Uh… Jeff, are you okay?”
Okay? I’ve never felt more happy! Ha ha ha ha ha haaaaaa, look at me. This face goes perfectly with me!” He couldn’t stop laughing. He stroked his face feeling it. Looking at it in the mirror. What caused this? Well, you may recall that when Jeff was fighting Randy something in his mind, his sanity, snapped.


You. Already. Said this. We didn’t forget what you wrote not four paragraphs ago!


Now he was left as a crazy killing machine, that is, his parents didn’t know.
Doctor,” said Jeff’s mom, “Is my son… alright, you know. In the head?”
Oh yes, this behavior is typical for patients that have taken very large amounts of pain killers. If his behavior doesn’t change in a few weeks, bring him back here, and we’ll give him a psychological test.”


That sounds like bullshit to me, doctor”, his mom said raising a brow. “What can I say? I’m not very good at my job”, the good doctor said with a shrug.


Oh thank you doctor.” Jeff’s mother went over to Jeff.” Jeff, sweety. It’s time to go.”
Jeff looks away from the mirror, his face still formed into a crazy smile. “Kay mommy, ha ha haaaaaaaaaaaa!” his mother took him by the shoulder and took him to get his clothes.
This is what came in,” said the lady at the desk. Jeff’s mom looked down to see the black dress pants and white hoodie her son wore. Now they were clean of blood and now stitched together.


Little know fact: Hospitals also function as taylors.


Jeff’s mother led him to his room and made him put his clothes on. Then they left, not knowing that this was their final day of life.
Later that night, Jeff’s mother woke to a sound coming from the bathroom. It sounded as if someone was crying. She slowly walked over to see what it was. When she looked into the bathroom she saw a horrendous sight. Jeff had taken a knife and carved a smile into his cheeks.
Jeff, what are you doing?” asked his mother.


What…. Kind of response is that?! Not an “oh my god!”? Nothing to indicate any resemblance of human emotion?! For fucks sake, lady!.


Jeff looked over to his mother. “I couldn’t keep smiling mommy. It hurt after awhile. Now, I can smile forever. Jeff’s mother noticed his eyes, ringed in black.
Jeff, your eyes!” His eyes were seemingly never closing.
I couldn’t see my face. I got tired and my eyes started to close. I burned out the eyelids so I could forever see myself; my new face.” Jeff’s mother slowly started to back away, seeing that her son was going insane. “What’s wrong mommy? Aren’t I beautiful?


Was “going” insane? What was your first fucking clue?! The insane laughter? The random twitching? Jesus!


Yes son,” she said, “Yes you are. L-let me go get daddy, so he can see your face.” She ran into the room and shook Jeff’s dad from his sleep. “Honey, get the gun we…..” She stopped as she saw Jeff in the doorway, holding a knife.
Mommy, you lied.” That’s the last thing they hear as Jeff rushes them with the knife, gutting both of them.


I can only assume that the knife was big enough to impale them both through the hurt, because the idea that an eleven year old boy could fight two adults and kill them is nothing short of bullshit. Why couldn’t he have killed them in their sleep? That would’ve made a bit more sense.


His brother Liu woke up, startled by some noise. He didn’t hear anything else, so he just shut his eyes and tried to go back to sleep. As he was on the border of slumber, he got the strangest feeling that someone was watching him. He looked up, before Jeff’s hand covered his mouth. He slowly raised the knife ready to plunge it into Liu. Liu thrashed here and there trying to escape Jeff’s grip.
Shhhhhhh,” Jeff said,”Just go to sleep.”


So, that was Jeff the Killer. Was it a good story? No. No it was not. Though it wasn’t a terrible story. Trust me, I’ll cover far worse in these reviews. However, it’s a story that suffers from huge leaps of logic, unrealistic dialogue, a jarring perspective change, and just poor storytelling in general. Not to mention, the idea of Jeff burning his eye open without going blind. If there’s anything going for this story in the very least, it’s Jeff himself. While not the most interesting of characters, his character actually develops as the story moves along. For the most part, he actually comes of as a normal teenager and although I criticized his choice to run away, one could attribute it to his age.


I suggested that Jeff's violent impulses should've been better expanded upon, but I was trying to work off of the writers intentions with the story. If he was going for a tragic element to Jeff's backstory, it would've been more effective to leave that element out of the story entirely. Jeff getting the urge to harm and kill when someone provoked him makes sense, but he felt it when sitting down for breakfast. Again, I can't help but get the feeling that he would've gone on to become a serial killer even if he wasn't pushed over the edge.


All this said, one question remains: why is this story so popular? That's mainly a matter of opinion, though I attribute it solely to the image accompanied with the story. I'll admit, it gave me a when I first saw it, but the novelty quickly wore off. I do think that the character of Jeff can be properly expanded upon, though the story that started it all is a sloppily written mess.


Grammar – 5/10
Pacing – 6/10
Horror – 2/10
Originality – 2/10

Overall – 4/10

Friday, June 21, 2013

Let's Discuss Metroid Other M


 Some time ago, I stumbled upon a article defending the story of Metroid Other M. I personally loathe Other M, so after skimming through the artical, I posted a comment on why I felt the writer was wrong in his points. He responded, we went back and forth, and it eventually lead to the discussion you'll see below. I'll provide a link to the article below, as it's an interesting read on it's own.




~VinceThePhilosopher
I have no problem with the direction they wanted to take Samus, but the execution was nothing short of laughable. What did Adam do to show that he was as compassionate and brilliant as Samus says? Sacrifice his life? That meant absolutely nothing to me, the player, seeing as how I never got to actually see or experience the threat he spoke about. Imagine if in Metroid Fusion we never got to see or experience the SA-X. There really isn't tension in a scene if we don't have a grasp on what's causing the fuss to begin with.
That's the story's problem as a whole: The player is expected to accept certain things that we are told about, regardless of how little logic their is to it. I really wouldn't have a problem with the idea of the authorization system if it weren't for the fact that there's no reason for it. It's bad enough that Samus blatently ignores logic when she comes to a situation she could normally handle, but the fact that she NEVER argues nor does she even questions Adam's commands makes her seem like an incompetent lapdog. Past instances aside, I would assume that she'd matured in both skill and ethics enough to the point that she'd at the very least interject her own views on what's happening around her.
You have to really ask yourself as you watch the story unfold: who is Adam Malkovich to ME? Samus in the prime games was never a "blank slate"; her actions reflected her character. She did SO much good into the galaxy for so little, you couldn't help but respect her. So when you hear her speak so fondly of Adam in Fusion, you think he must be something impressive. But in Other M, all we do is hear about how great, wise, and noble he is from Samus. We don't actually see him show any of those traits until the very end of the game.
You speak as though this game telling that story was always nessicary. It wasn't. Mainly because of this one thing that many people don't seem to understand: Samus doesn't NEED to have a compelling character. I equate her to a female Indiana Jones. A likeable, respectable character but not really deep. The whole aspect of characters like that is experiencing the adventure through the character, not with them. That's why Kingdom of the Crystal Skull was so flawed. It attempted to have the story revolve around Indy, but you just can't do that with such a limited character. Same with Samus.
Do I think Samus' character can be expanded upon properly? Of course I do. So much of Other M's story could've been so if it presented the story in a more restrained and character driven way. I would've liked to see Samus interact with Adam more, maybe making casual banter with him while moving about in a peaceful environment. But as it stands, being told constantly that I should care about what's happening isn't good storytelling.
And I stand by what I said. Both this game and Twilight violate the "Show, don't tell" rule. Oh, and the Manga? I think that's bad too.


*hythrain Jun 6, 2013   Writer
In an indirect way, you proved my point about Samus' "blank slate." When I say she was blank, I mean she had no defining personality. She had no voice to speak, no way of expressing who she was besides "Do I shoot you or not?" In that regard, players DEFINE who she is (I also find it funny you had brought up Twilight to begin with, because this was how Bella was designed. She had no defining personality or look, which was an intentional thing. It was so the young female readers could create Bella to be what they wanted (in this case, themselves)).

I'm not saying it's a great or even good game. I just don't think it's as bad as others say.

You don't need to see the threat that Adam went to deal with, because you already know the threat from older games. You fought Metroids before, and they weren't fun to fight. Recall your first encounter with a Metroid. Was it fun? Or did it cause you to freak out and be terrified of these things? For me, it was the latter. I didn't need to see what Adam was fighting because I already know, from past games, how dangerous Metroids are. In that regard, no, you don't need to see.

When I got to watching the rest of that video... it made me realize something. If this story was intentional... where Samus was suppose to play up Adam as being this great guy while he continued to be a dick... this creates a rather twisted side to Samus and shows she's a LOT more messed up and flawed than we previously thought. And I think this is why she suddenly doesn't interject her own thoughts into it once Adam's there; her own messed up personality causes her to suddenly care more about his thoughts than her own.

Also, there's no reason to not give her more character development. Kingdom of the Crystal Skull failed for a lot of reasons, not just because of the Indy-focused story. One thing that's important is that if you're going to take a limited character and make a story around them, you have to expand them. Bit by bit, this was happening with Samus. Zero Mission, Fusion and the manga all built on it. Other M was just the biggest amount of growth, though sadly not in a direction people wanted or could even consider healthy. If you don't like the manga, nothing can be said of that. I only read the manga recently, and I liked it (I was particularly touched at a moment when I thought Ridley was actually going to show some compassion to young Samus since he had a VERY sympathetic look on his face, almost like he was saying "You should've stayed hidden, kid...").

Banter would've been a very BAD way to go. Why? Well, for one they did that in Kid Icarus. Guess what? A LOT of people hated the banter between Pit and Palutena. Second, unlike Kid Icarus, Metroid is meant to carry a much more serious tone in its game. Having them banter a bit would feel out of place, unless done right. I think what would've helped is if we had, in general, gotten more of the side cast, and if we some occasional "break" moments, where Samus goes back to where Adam is to rest (which would've worked nicely for showing the side cast, since perhaps they'd be on break too). This could be when banter works. However, based on the manga and Fusion I also think Adam is an incredibly serious character so banter with him specifically wouldn't work well.

I do think -A- Samus-focused game needed to happen, to force Sakamoto to develop her into a proper character. Not Other M specifically, but something. Throughout all of the Metroid, I NEVER saw Samus as a simple, limited character like Indiana Jones. I always saw her as something like Mega Man in MM7, where she seemed to be limited but was very easily capable of breaking out and show she was so much more with a SINGLE line of dialogue ("I AM MORE THAN A ROBOT!" (Yes, I know this is the US version only)). Hopefully the next Metroid game will fix this and present a more fitting and healthy story. I just don't want people saying this is a bad game on reasons that make sense from a logical standpoint (Not everything does, but a lot does as I wrote in this).

 ~VinceThePhilosopher Jun 6, 2013
No, it wasn't intentional. The way that Sakamoto speaks of this game's story shows that he thinks it's more than in actually is (much like George Lucas and the Star Wars prequels)

And really, even is that were the case why would I, or any other person for that matter, ever want to hear what this woman's story is? Like Bella in Twilight, I can't relate to her disturbing worship of this one man because I never get to see him as she describes him.

As for not seeing the threat Adam mentioned making sense... well as you said, we've seen metroids in the previous games and we know what they're capable of, but using previous games as a reference is in itself a contradiction. Metroid 2 has you killing over a hundred metroids, none of which actually requiring the ice beam. You mean to tell me, that Samus can kill them in the hundreds without utilizing their key weakness but can't because Anthony said is was impossible? You've got to be kidding me. Now, if they a had shown metroids in large numbers as Anthony opened the door, or even showed how him fighting his way through them to reach the detachment switch, I would have no problem understanding why he didn't want Samus going in there... now that I think about it, the reason he didn't authorize the power bomb at first was because he said is was it was too dangerous to use it in condense areas. If it's really that powerful, why not just tell her to go in their and use it to kill them all in one fell swoop?

When I referred to banter, I didn't mean to that extent. Samus and Adam communicating and working as a cohesive unit could've easily helped us get an idea of how they viewed one another. Maybe have a scene where she's starting to come under the pressure of their situation and Adam consoles and encourages her to stay strong. Both of them are professionals in their field and I have no problem imagining that they'd make the occasional quip while on their jobs. It'd have to be restrained, but it''s not impossible.

(by the way, if I come off as obnoxious I apologize. I don't mean to sound so cynical. I just like a good debate).

*hythrain Jun 6, 2013   Writer
Okay, yea, that would make more sense for banter. I'm used to banter being a bit more comical in nature.

Regarding the Metroid unit... well, he didn't go in to kill them directly because he knew he couldn't kill them. He went in there to "cause as much damage as possible" to force the ship's computers to eject the unit and cause it to self-destruct (Which I feel is a dumb plot idea. Why was there no computer that could cause that?). Once he went in, though, there was NO coming out. Once he caused enough damage, the unit would eject from the ship and BLOW UP. This was ALSO the case for Samus. If he ordered Samus to go in and cause the damage, there'd be no return for her. A Power Bomb would've certain caused enough damage, but Samus wouldn't have lived. This was why he didn't order her to go Power Bomb it.

Regarding Metroid 2: Return of Samus... there are two things here. First off, you get the Ice Beam VERY early, meaning you don't fight Metroids for long without it. Up to that point, you're also fighting weak, infant Metroids. Much like how the infants in Other M were still weak to cold (but as they grew would be immune to that, as Adam stated), chances are infant Metroids that weren't biologically modified to be weak to cold are too weak to be able to withstand normal shots. These two things combined explain Metroid 2. This was also the only game, in the entire series, that you encounter infant Metroids and can actually fight them, so it makes more sense in that regard.

Actually, it could be. Yea, he talks like it's about more, and this could be what it is. It could quite possibly be NOBODY can see what he intended because it's just THAT fucked up. However, that said...

Looking at this story in the same logic point I did previously... at what point will Adam actually be nice? He likely knows that everything that's going on at the Bottle Ship is because of people who co-opted his own report to get this project to be made, and so he knows what's hidden there (Sector Zero and the Metroids). Because of this, he's a lot more serious about getting this problem fixed. So he's a military commander, leading a mission that will result in the destruction of the Bottle Ship (Once they get any survivors out, they'd likely blow the whole thing). He can't afford to be soft on his troops. He needs them to be strong enough to do their jobs, or else shit will go down. This is why he's being an asshole to Samus, because he has to make sure she's strong enough to do her job (Which she utterly failed at when it mattered, aka Ridley). Is he doing it the right way? No. But that's what he's doing.

Also, felt like addressing this. In that video, they talked about the flashback scene of when Adam's brother died. I interpreted this scene differently. I felt the whole reason she pointed out how the guy was "Adam's brother" was because that was why she cared, but rather that's why HE should care. He was willing to let his own brother die. As someone who saw her family killed, this didn't settle well with him. She tried to use the ploy of family to get him to let her go, but he stood fast. Though I'll also note, even if she had left the moment she wanted to, she wouldn't have even gotten there in time. Adam knew this too, thus why he told her to stay put. This leads to her leaving his command, because at the time she feels like she can't follow the orders of someone who was willing to let their own brother die. At least, this is how I saw it all.

The way I see this game... this shouldn't have been the game to introduce us to Adam Malkovich. We should've had another game before Other M, that developed his character and his relationship with Samus in a more positive light, THEN do Other M. How would people view it if Adam was the complete opposite of who he was in previous games?

To an extent, though... I blame the fact that Sakamoto is Japanese. As someone who has numerous Japanese friends... that country is sexist on so many levels, and it's ingrained in the culture. The Samus/Adam relationship we were shown, where Samus idolized Adam and he was kind of a dick to her... this happens ALL THE TIME in Japanese stories. I can't tell you how many anime shows I've seen with this "problem."
However, in the end, the guy turns around. Adam did too, when he apologized to Samus. But there's something worth noting in all this... when this is done in other Japanese stories, they're not focusing on the girl. They're focusing on the guy! This was Sakamoto's problem. He wrote something that was generally accepted in Japan but we got to see everything from the other viewpoint, and this in turn made it look very ugly. That video says "Don't say it's that he's Japanese," but the fact is that IS why. He wrote a typical Japanese story that normally is considered good, but it starred the opposite gender and thus we saw how twisted the story type was. Samus' internal monologue revealed it (Since in a male-focus story, you won't get the extensive thoughts of a female as Samus gave). This is also why he's amazed how badly received it is.

~VinceThePhilosopher Jun 7, 2013
Regardless of the reason behind it, that doesn't make it right. Games are an immersive medium, and the gamer needs to be drawn into the emotions of the character that we're following. Two things could have been done to make me flexible toward's Adam:

1. Have a scene where he mourns his decision to kill his brother. Perhaps have Samus stumble upon him while he's in the hallway. He doesn't have to be bawling, but just showing him trying to collect himself to carry on will make us relate to him. Samus would ask him why he did it and he gives a speech about how one has to make sacrifices for the greater good (it'd also be descent foreshadowing to his inevitable death) It'd also help us admire his decision to a degree, showing that while his decision is painful, it was ultimately for the greater good. To be fair, that was already the case. But the fact that he barely batted an eye to his actions makes him seem far too machine like to be likable. I don't count him looking at the photo of Samus and his brother.


2. Drop the authorization system altogether and acknowledge Samus as his equal. I won't jump at the "Adam is sexist" like everyone else. Honestly, you could make the argument that he was just going about his tactics the wrong way, but if you're going to claim that Fusion in canon along with this game, my interpretation of Adam should come from what she spoke of. At no point in the story did I have the idea that he trusted or respected Samus in the slightest. Instead of authorizing weapons for her to use, maybe he could of advised it in situation that seemed like I'd be difficult for her to figure how to get somewhere or do something. I'm not saying that should happen all the time, but just enough times where we can see why Samus praised his tactical prowess.

Honestly, I never really used the ice beam in Metroid 2. I hated using it actually. That's a mistake on my part.

I didn't say show him killing the Metroids, just fighting them off in order to reach the console or whatever. You can't say he couldn't kill the metroids, we've killed them in the past WITHOUT the damn ice beam, including Queen Metroid. And in regards to Adam detaching the part of the ship so he could detonate it, I'd like to barrow a quote from thegamingbrit on youtube: "So why are these metroids so unstoppable? Blowing them up seems to do the trick".

Wouldn't it have meant more if Adam instructed Samus to detonate the bomb? I can see him having to go in there to release some kind of special gas in the chamber that'd make the explosion have some kind of chemical reaction that'd kill the metroids for sure. Just image the emotional conflict with Samus as she has to sacrifice the one she cares about for the greater good as he too had to do.

(Unrelated note: I think a remake of Metroid 2 would be a good idea for either the Wii U or 3DS. What do you think?)

*hythrain Jun 7, 2013   Writer
That's where the fault in Japanese writing is. A character like Adam isn't allowed to show weakness. EVER. Again, we're talking not about Sakamoto's writing, but Japanese story telling IN GENERAL. When a character is designed like Adam, weakness isn't an option in any form. This is why scenes like what you wanted wouldn't happen. Who knows now, though? Knowing this failed, Sakamoto will have to take a good look. This could lead to a change to Japanese story writing in general.

The problem with that method, where Adam "recommends" the gear, is that it suggests Samus is far more stupid than she is which would be as bad, if not worse, than what they pulled. She can figure stuff out. However, without taking her powers away entirely, there's not a lot of options for how to gate her progress. Yes, there were really REALLY dumb moments (like the hell run), but for the most part Adam was rather good at authorizing equipment when Samus needed it.

As for the Ice Beam... first off, aren't you required to equip the Ice Beam when you get it? It's usually been one of those upgrades that auto equips (It didn't in the Prime series due to how weapons were designed (And didn't even appear in Prime 2 or 3, but this is because it was replaced with the Dark Beam in Prime 2 which had cold capabilities which allowed it to act as an Ice Beam and was replaced with the Ice Missile in Prime 3, which also had cold capabilities). Also, I can't say for Metroid 2 (Honestly, it's the only Metroid I've not played. I JUST got it on the eShop), but I'm pretty sure in Super Metroid you couldn't kill Metroids without the Ice Beam equipped. I know in the Metroid Prime games you had to freeze them, and in Fusion you didn't fight a Metroid until the very end of the game (Where you couldn't hurt it until you got the Ice Beam, which you got in that fight). As for the Metroid Queen, I call that an exception due to its changed state and the fact you have to use a Power Bomb from INSIDE it.

Finally, I've said this a few times, but Adam didn't need to kill the Metroids. He wasn't even going for a switch. He was, quite literally, going in with his gun and shooting EVERYTHING. The plan wasn't to hurt or kill Metroids, but to damage Sector Zero itself so badly that the computer fail-safes would eject the unit and then make it explode (The design of it was that if the Metroids got out of control and began trying to break out, the system would destroy them). There's not a lot to show of "Let's shoot at all the equipment and walls" that could be seen as heroic, thus it was skipped.

As for the bomb thing, Power Bombs don't work like that. She can't plant a bomb and then detonate it at will. When she plants the bomb, it'll either detonate immediately or a few seconds after (It varies from game to game). Because of this, any option involving her going into Sector Zero meant she would be killed.

~VinceThePhilosopher Jun 7, 2013
I was speaking on what would benefit the story. As for the "Japanese Story" excuse, yeah NO.

Shigesato Itoi, a brilliant writer and essayist who understands how to convey emotion in a realistic manner.

Fumito Ueda, master of showing grand emotions with visuals.

Hiroyuki ÅŒwaku, a writer skilled in the art of symbolism.

All Japanese writers, all skilled, all have games that are considered masterpieces of storytelling.

And I HAVE played Metroid 2 all the way through. Gun related upgrades are found, though you have to go back and forth to get the ones that you want. Ice Beam really isn't nessicary in that game. I have to warn you about to things: the music is somewhat grating and it hasn't aged too well.

Again, how would the explosion pose a threat to them if Samus's weapons, which are considered too dangerous to use in the ship, apparently couldn't get the job done?

You speak the story alone, but like I said games are immersive. Having the player interact with the threat so we know what Adam tells us is true is important. Why? Because it cements Adams claims so we have no reason to question him. It'd actually seem more admirable to see him walk into the room that the player couldn't conquer without the slightest bit of hesitation.

This is a GAME, yet it doesn't feel like your getting much of anything accomplished. Take Samus out of the game and you don't really effect what's happening at all. The player should NOT feel that his/her actions are inconsequencial, and game play shouldn't take a back seat to the cutscenes. Sakamoto placed Theater Mode into the game so players wouldn't be burdened with the "distraction" of gameplay.

*hythrain Jun 7, 2013   Writer
My argument is about the story ALONE. That's why it's called "Story Mode." I focus on the story, and only the story. When a story is very good, the game becomes more immersive. But not all games ARE immersive, and Other M doesn't seem like it was intended to be as immersive like the Prime games were. I'm not going to comment on this, in any form, because this isn't my intent.

I think things are getting mixed up. Before when we talked about Power Bombs, we were talking about using it in Sector Zero to help initiate its self-destruct sequence (Which can't be done without Samus being the one killed, because she can't set a bomb and then detonate it whenever she wants). Now you're talking about if the Power Bomb is even a threat to Metroids? From Metroid 2, the design of Queen Metroid was you need to destroy her from inside, in Power Ball mode. You can't use Ice Beam like this, making Power Bomb the only viable weapon. While the Metroids were DNA spliced to eliminate their weakness to cold (when older anyway), this didn't change everything about them. Could the Power Bomb kill them? Probably, but if she used a Power Bomb in Sector Zero, she likely would've triggered the self-destruct and killed herself in the process.

If the Ice Beam isn't required, that sounds like a design bug. In every game that followed Metroid 2, the Ice Beam was a required tool to fight Metroids (Or some form of cold-generating weapon to freeze Metroids). Queen Metroids are a bit different, since they're a lot stronger and more resilient. It makes sense just shooting them with an Ice Beam wouldn't work when you consider that (In general, as a Metroid evolved further, it became more powerful and became more resistant to Samus' weapons).

The idea of the weakness to cold is to give Samus a means of fighting Metroids that DOESN'T involve a massive explosion that can cause serious damage to her surroundings. You CAN kill them other ways, but using those methods has a big impact on what's around her (Now, I know you're gonna bring up past games regarding this, so lemme address this really quick: In past games, the design was different. Not the weapon, but how it was used. However, the power of the Power Bomb was always present. It could destroy terrain in older games, but for the sake of not dealing with what kind of impact a Power Bomb could have on the environment the idea of it wrecking terrain wasn't done. Other M is saying the Power Bomb CAN cause a lot of destruction, and as such we should be going by this version of the Power Bomb and how it operates, not bringing up past versions where the functionality was changed due to programming limitations and trying to avoid rather messy situations).

As for Japanese stories, you're misunderstanding me. I'm not saying all Japanese writers do this. What I AM saying is that the use of a relationship like the one Samus and Adam have is done a lot and is generally not viewed so negatively. However, this is because these stories focus around the male and NOT the female, thus you don't get the female's thoughts on everything. You care about the male and thus you don't even notice this happening. Sakamoto basically wrote something that is common in Japan and not so negatively seen when done the normal way, but then had the story be able the female! This is why it's viewed so poorly. Now you suddenly have a story from the other gender's viewpoint, and people can see the problem with it.

Wanna know where else this kind of relationship is present? The ever popular Naruto. I don't know how much you know about Naruto, so I'm going to assume you know nothing to explain myself. The relationship of Sasuke and Sakura is a lot like Adam and Samus. Sakura/Samus idolizes Sasuke/Adam, but Sasuke/Adam is a dick towards Sakura/Samus. He even, at one point, inflicts bodily harm on her, though in the end he's being seen as a "good guy" despite all the shit. And this "good guy" moment is what's suppose to justify everything Sakura/Samus thinks of Sasuke/Adam.

The only difference in these two stories is that Sakura is NOT a focus in Naruto. Sasuke is. IT'S THE SAME PROBLEM! How can we blame Sakamoto alone when Japanese media does it themselves?!

Now yes, there are twists in events. Some alterations. But the base story is there. You can look at a lot of the most popular shonen mangas out there and see this problem (This problem is also present in Bleach with Ichigo and Inoue, though Ichigo is a bit more open with thanking his friends). It's practically a trope. You wanna complain about Sakamoto? Then first complain about everyone who came before him, who allowed this to be a normal thing in Japan.

I think it's worth finding out if Japan raised as much of a stink about the story as people in North America and Europe did, if only because it could act as a very clear reflection of Japanese culture.

~VinceThePhilosopher Jun 7, 2013
...Don't mention that piece of nothing in my presence... (Yes, I know about Naruto and Bleach. I thoroughly hate them both).

It isn't a design bug. You really don't need it unless you find it useful. You have the option to switch what type of shot you fire so long as you trek to get the one you want (which is a pain because I don't recall there being a map in the game).

You can't equate all writing in Japan for those tropes. Just because it's popular doesn't mean that it represents the medium it's in. That'd be like saying all rap music is misogynistic just because most mainstream rappers speak ill of them. It doesn't matter what the reasoning behind it is, what ultimately matters is the product. There are some works of art that the consumer can appreciate more when they know the process that went into creating it, but this is not the case.

The main reason Metroid Other M didn't raise is stink in Japan had little to do with cultural differences. Metroid isn't nearly as popular there as it is here (for what reason, I'm not entirely sure).

You can't review the story based primarily on the cinematic aspects because the the very title of the game. There are some aspects of storytelling are expected in a series. Metroid is a series that prides itself in allowing the gameplay to draw the player into the story, using subtle hints and restraint the character's reactions to the situations at hand. When the cinematic parts of Metroid last longer than the actual game then there is a huge problem.

You're right. A story can in itself immerse a player. But when most of what drives the emotional core of the story is relayed through exposition, with numerous plot points popping up out of nowhere and being dropped immediately without resolution, and an ending that is so forced and cliche that it borders on being childish, how the in name of Gotch could you POSSIBLY immerse yourself into the story?!

This story's theme is so hamfisted and idiotic that I feel almost insulted by it being considered something of value.

The Theme of Motherhood: Metroid Other M = M.O.M, the Bottle Ship, Baby's cry, her mourning over the death of a baby metroid, so many characters with MB as their initials, and the fact that every single female's character act without rationality due to their "maternal instincts".

And you're damn right I'll call out Sakamoto alone on this, because he's tarnished the legacy of a series I enjoyed and a character I admired. In fact, I dare say that I could've tolerated Other M if it had been an original series all it's own. But so long as people are defending this sterile, worthless farce of a story, I'll continue to raise a stink about, just like I'll continue to do so when people claim Twilight or Eragon are great works of literature. I, like you, am an ispiring artist. I hold myself to high standards and maintain a critical eye on even my favorite pieces of art. As such, I CAN'T allow something like this happen again.

This isn't the first time this has happened. Parasite Eve's protangonist Aya Bray is one of the strongest female protagonist is gaming who was ruined in the third installment of series, going from a strong, confident, and very human character to a whimpering, hopeless, over sexualized mess. Why don't I make a big deal about that too? Simple. It had no impact on the series. Unlike Other M, which after it came out has done much more harm then good in the Metroid fan community.

*hythrain Jun 7, 2013   Writer
It doesn't matter if you hate them. The fact remains that they're popular. That's why I referenced them in my argument.

You can equate pretty much ALL writing to tropes. Any character can be put into at least one trope. Any story has at least one trope. You can't find something that doesn't use ANY existing trope. What matters is smart use of tropes. But you've missed my point. The basic story that Sakamoto used is a common trope of Japanese writing. It's not used in everything but it's used rather commonly, and I named off some some incredibly popular examples to show it exists in Japan and, to them, isn't even considered a problem. I know people who read Bleach and Naruto, and they'll complain about the sexist ways these stories come off (Like how Sakura was basically useless for the entire fucking story in Naruto until very recently (A couple weeks ago)), but these complaints don't happen in Japan. This is important to know and recognize. It's also a rather sexist trope, but it's one that people outside Japan don't notice as being sexist until it's done with the other gender, and in Japan it's just not noticed as being sexist at all because, in many ways, Japan is a rather sexist country.

Sakamoto is Japanese. He lives in Japan. He grew up in Japanese culture and in the tropes used in Japanese writing. He used a trope commonly used in Japan, that isn't seen as a problem by his culture, for Other M. However, this trope is not written with the female character being the focus. This is also important. It's why the game is perceived so differently, because we see a side of the trope that is not normally shown. These aspects, all combined, matter. The culture he's used to matters, because it shapes his personality and his views. It shapes what he thinks is and isn't good. It shapes how he writes. You can't just ignore it, just like how you can't call out Sakamoto alone. It doesn't matter if he tarnished a legacy. That's NOT the problem. The problem is how Japanese culture is and what they think is and isn't acceptable. That TYPE of story shouldn't be made ANYWHERE. NOBODY, not just Sakamoto, should be writing a story with this trope. But that's not the case. Sakamoto, like many before him and many after him, wrote a story based on what's seen as a popular and acceptable trope in his country. Like I said before, if you wanna get mad at Sakamoto, you also need to get mad at EVERYONE that made the trope Sakamoto used as being acceptable in Japan. If it wasn't acceptable, we would've gotten a different story.

And yes I can. I can review the story of a game solely on the story. I don't require the game play to know the story. I don't need to play Mega Man 3 to understand the story: Dr. Wily, after being beaten in MM2, seemed to turn over a new leaf. He wanted to work with Light to create a new robot, a peace keeping robot. However, the robots that were sent out to obtain the items that would power their creation suddenly went berserk, forcing Mega Man to stop them before they hurt anyone. Then, after getting the Power Crystals, a new set of robots attacked that Mega Man had to deal with. When he returned home, Wily had taken the giant robot he and Light made and planned to use it to take over the world. Mega Man went out to stop Wily. He destroyed the giant robot, which caused the castle to begin to fall apart. In the chaos, Mega Man and Wily were both crushed by rubble. Proto Man, who Mega Man had ran into several times as Break Man during the game, then came to try and save them. He could only find Mega Man, thus only saved Mega Man, while Wily escaped on his own.

See? I know the story. I don't need the game play for it. Yes, the game play can add depth, but it's not required. It's still a story! Interactive or not, I can judge it purely on its story if I want to. That's my choice. I can also judge other Metroid games purely on their story. The only difference that Other M brought was that it tried to give Samus a personality. Other games didn't, so if I judged the story I have to try and fill Samus' personality on my own. You might not like that I'm judging it purely on story, but I'm allowed to do that. I don't need to judge if it's immersive or not. I don't care if it's immersive or not. I care if I like the story.

Popularity isn't important when it comes to reaction. If a million people in the US play Other M and 200,000 people in Japan play, it doesn't matter. You can still find out what their reception to the game's story is (In fact, because of you, I hope to one day do that. I have a lot of Japanese friends, and I'm going to try organizing getting them, and their friends, together in groups to watch Other M in its cinematic form, and see what they think. I want to see how the cultures they grew up in affect them). If the majority of Japanese people who played Other M had no problem with the story, chances are the majority of Japan, if they played it, would have no problem either. That's why the popularity doesn't matter for this. It's like a survey. If you survey 1000 people and ask them "What do you like more? Apples or oranges?" and get some result, the percentages could be applied to a larger scale with a margin of error, usually something like 5%. That's how surveys and reception work. What if 95% of those who DID play Other M had no problem with the story? That's a BIG percentage, and would lead to a rather accurate vision of how Japan as a whole would see it.

I'm not getting into the themes, because as far as I'm concerned there is no theme. The theme they had was pure bullshit, and thus there is none. I'm also not going to comment on something like Twilight except this: Twilight has lots of fans. To them, it's a good story. To us, it's not. I'll express my distaste for Twilight, but if I'm facing someone who likes Twilight, I'm just going to tell them I disagree and move on. Other M, however, has few fans. Most people think it wasn't a good game because of its story (not because of its gameplay, which was good). You're comparing apples to oranges here. I'm not saying it's the best story ever. I just think it's better than people give it credit (I went into Other M knowing all about the sexist nature of the game. I walked out thinking "That's it?" It also helps that I'm understanding of the culture Sakamoto was raised in, so I'm sure that understanding has lessened the effect on me).

As for Parasite Eve... Just wait until I cover that game. It's on my list (I'll say that it's one of my favourite games, so I can't wait to review it).

~VinceThePhilosopher Jun 8, 2013
If you're admitting that they story has all these flaws, I don't understand why you still claim to enjoy it, which you DID say numerous times. If we were judging the game on it's own merit, it's mediocre at best. The gameplay itself isn't nearly as good as people say it is.

As a writer I know you've heard the term "less is more". So many of the scenes in Other M would've been fine with her keeping silent and allowing her body language to show how she felt.

If your speaking on the nature of the sexism in the game... then I agree. It's not quite as bad as people think it is. For what it is, Sakamoto intended to show how Samus grew from Adam's sacrifice, which shows that he at the very least understands the concept of character growth. The problem comes again in how Samus views Adam, and how we view him. All we know about Adam is what Samus tells us, and given how she asks in certain situations it's made clear that what we hear is coming from a Bias narrator, which is a problem since the player needs to be able to form their own connection to Adam in order for his sacrifice to truly mean something.

Really though, the context of the writing really doesn't matter to me. What ultimately matters is the result. For example, when I hear a Caucasian comedian made a tasteless joke about African Americans, the first thing I say in response is, "was it at least funny?". You're clearly doing the same, looking past the criticism and seeing the story for what it is, but you should at least acknowledge that cultural differences isn't an excuse for terrible cliche writing. Just like saying Pocahontas was a kids film doesn't excuse it from be an oversimplified and idiotic interpretation of a real life tragedy (I'm Blackfoot and Cherokee).


The theme it has is bullshit, so there is none? You JUST acknowledged that there was a theme! You can't say it isn't there just because it's terrible.

And yeah, Parasite Eve... well, I'm not sure if you know but there are two more games in the series, one of which is on the PSP. Skip the first sequel, play the third (even though I hate what they did to Aya). Having played that game, I can say that a character like Aya was the way to go in Other M: Strong, competent, yet still vulnerable. Seeing Samus. It taints old memories, knowing that the character we were following the in Prime games was such an emotional trainwreck.

*hythrain Jun 8, 2013   Writer
I'm aware of the sequels. I've not played them. I tried to play PE2 and the controls pissed me off to no end.

When a story has a theme that is just utter bullshit and terrible, I treat the story as though it had no theme. Why? Because the writer clearly didn't know what the fuck they were doing, so it's better to treat it as being themeless. In video games, it's quite common to not have a theme. Other M had that motherhood theme, but it was so poorly done and seemed to tacked on that I've chosen to ignore it because it just doesn't work. The theme of motherhood is just a poor choice for any story, because it's a sexist theme; the only thing women care about is motherhood? What? So when I see this theme, I ignore it. Parasite Eve's also used this theme (the novel uses it) in certain games, and it comes off poor like anything else that uses it.

For me, if a Caucasian made a tasteless joke about people of African descent, my immediate response would be to see how friends of mine who are of African descent react. If they can genuinely find it funny or look past it, I'll let it go. If they have an issue with it, I'll have an issue with it. If they're not around, I'll look down on it. If I found it funny, I'll feel disgusted in myself for finding it funny.

When I'm looking at the story to see it for what it is, I'm not saying I don't acknowledge cultural differences as an excuse for cliche writing itself. I'm acknowledging cultural differences as a reason why the relationship between two characters seems so skewed and sexist to us. In our culture, the Adam/Samus relationship would be called abusive. In Japan, not so much. That's what I'm acknowledging, that their relationship is viewed very differently depending on culture. It's how I can see scenes like when Adam shoots Samus and understand the thinking behind it: the Power Suit is tied to Samus' will power, and she was more than aware she was shot by Adam thus why it failed. This is abusive to us, but from a Japanese standpoint this is done because if she was left active, she might've been more forceful about not letting Adam go in. Breaking her will... well, ensures she'll do what Adam wants her to. She'll be too weak to stop Adam. And this is why cultural differences need to be considered. It's not a good relationship to us, but to Sakamoto it is. That's why he didn't see a problem with it, that's why people call it sexist. Welcome to Japan.

I watch a lot of anime and play a lot of Japanese games. I've grown used to the tropes they use. The relationship Adam and Samus have, I've seen it a lot so I'm used to it. It's why I process the game's story with cultural differences in mind; it helps me understand the story from the mindset of the writer and, in turn, appreciate it a bit more. Do I think Other M is a great story? No. Do I think it's a good story? A little bit. Do I think it's better than a lot of people claim? Obviously yes. If Other M was written by a Caucasian and came out like it is, I would hate it. Knowing it was a Japanese person skews my view, because I know a fair bit about the culture and how they think.

I was a fan of the gameplay. After several Prime games, I was glad to get into 3rd person again. It was fun to me, and the system Team Ninja designed worked well. The game was challenging, much like Ninja Gaiden games are (And if you mention 3, I'll just say Wii U). But this isn't the focus of our discussion, so moving on...

Y'know what? I don't think "less is more" would work here. Why? Because we already know Samus sort of idolizes Adam. Even if she was silent about it for most of the game, people would still see the sexist nature in the game. If something is even hinted at, people can see it.

For me, the only real fault of Other M comes from Sakamoto's lack of understanding how to write characters at all. He's not done a lot of it, which is kind of a big deal since he's the writer. He should've considered this stuff LONG ago, but he hasn't. Now he has to pick up the slack.

~VinceThePhilosopher Jun 8, 2013
I disagree. Motherhood can be a good theme for a game, if it's placed in the hands of a competent writer. Someone like Shigesato Itoi would be perfect for the job. Granted, it'd be exceptionally hard to pull of, but it's possible. I think we can agree that Metroid is not the series to place that them into though.

When I say less is more, I don't mean for her to be silent for most of the game. Take the scene where she's waking up (the Zero Suit bothers me, by the way). What if she remained silent as the scene was unfolding, allowing her facial expression to convey a look of regret? The problem with exposition is if it's done too much, we begin to get the feeling that the writer of said story doesn't think we can put two and two together.

Another decent example would be from the movie Tangled. If you haven't seen it, take the time to search for the scene were the parents are mourning for the lost of their daughter. In that scene, they don't say a word of dialog and yet so much emotion is shown in the scene by their expressions.

If they were to let Adam's actions speak for themselves and let us come to our own conclusions about who he was as a character, they wouldn't HAVE to rely on exposition to let us know how everyone felt about the situation.

I won't mention Ninja Gaiden 3. Let's just pretend that watered down piece of trash never existed.

*hythrain Jun 8, 2013   Writer
Play Ninja Gaiden 3 on the Wii U. It's a lot better. They fixed all those lack-of-difficulty issues.

Some scenes, I don't think work silently. The scene of Samus waking up, and she's recalling the Baby Metroid. For players who are new to the series, or simply have never played both Metroid 2 and Super Metroid (Until I did some reading up to understand about the Baby Metroid, all the stuff regarding that specific Metroid made no sense to me when I played Super Metroid, since I had never played Metroid 2), they don't know about the Baby Metroid. So you see flashes back to when Samus fought Mother Brain and how the baby Metroid saved her, but if you're someone who doesn't know anything about the baby Metroid you don't know what's going on. You really referenced the wrong scene to speak of this about. This was a scene that needs a fair bit of spoken dialogue, so people who don't know what's going on can know. Zero Suit Samus is... well, I'm just going to throw it up to more Japanese culture. If it was an American design when they first introduced it in 3D (Super Smash Bros. Brawl), there's a far more likely chance she wouldn't have been as busty.

I've yet to ever find a story that did motherhood as a theme well, unless it was only a very small aspect of the game (Parasite Eve 1) to the point where you can't say it was a theme. It's something that you need a large female cast to do, and to have several of those characters be used to balance it (They don't care about motherhood or don't get involved in it, creating the idea that not all women care about motherhood).

Our own conclusions about Adam would be the same, if using the same story. Exposition isn't the problem; it's Adam's actions. If his actions matched what Samus was saying, it'd be different. However, as I've pointed out, we'd be less likely to have issues with it if we were focusing on Adam, not Samus. We already know, thanks to Metroid Fusion, that she respects Adam in some way. By focusing on Samus and showing Adam being a dick, we then begin to question Samus from Fusion, with or without exposition (Assuming players know about Fusion. For players that don't, the exposition Samus gives fills in the details. In this situation, the only thing a lack of exposition would do would have players just treat Adam as a dick instead of Adam is a dick and Samus is kinda fucked up in her head.

~VinceThePhilosopher Jun 8, 2013
I'll concede that the theme motherhood couldn't work as the primary focus of a game.

The story in the Other M beats you over the head that it comes after Super Metroid. I'm not talking about the flashback points. I'm referring to the moments where she speaks on her feelings about the what happened. To be fair, it makes sense that she'd make a comment or two about how she felt, but she just goes on and on to the point where it becomes redundant.

You know what a story like this needed to do? Show how Samus' pain effects her professional work. I don't mean she outright starts to break down on the job, but have her posture slouch a bit, make her look slightly restrained. Hell, show her expression looking cold, almost apathetic. Honestly, the idea of Samus becoming emotionally distant opens up decent possibilities in connecting with the characters around her. As she goes on the mission, she gradually begins to open up to those around her, including Adam. I think it would've been a good way to show those who saw Samus as just a ice queen that there's more to her then they think.

But there I go again offering suggestions that radically alter the story that was presented. But that's the problem with Other M's story: so much is handled poorly that in order to improve upon the story, you'd need to change almost every aspect about it.

Going back to that idea I had, if you want to give Samus a personality and show she has depth, perhaps the best way to do it is to have Samus be what Metroid fans have interpreted her to be and expand upon it rather than give her such an emotional personality outright. If you want to have fans understand who she really is, you have to gradually ease them into the Character. After all, this is one of the most respected characters in video game history we're talking about.

*hythrain Jun 8, 2013   Writer
Your ideas on how to show the effects does have its merits. I hate to do this again, but I have to: if the game was written by a writer from North America or Europe, we might've very well gotten that.

That said, I do think it can work to make her have a more emotional side to her personality. For one, if they made her cold and detached, it makes her uninteresting. However, we know she's not cold and detached. Metroid Prime 3, Metroid 2, and Metroid Fusion all show she's not detached.

She's been through a lot of trauma. It comes from content you don't like, but you can't deny it's a part of cannon; her parents were killed, the very species that raised her afterwards are also dead, she's had to exterminate the only other race connected to those who raised her (the Metroids)... after the events of Super Metroid, I could very easily see her breaking down and going into an emotional fit. Ignoring Other M, the baby Metroid DID see Samus as a mother. Because of this, the combination of it the two of them being the last relics of the Chozo and the fact that the baby Metroid treats Samus as its mother does mean it's likely she would've developed a connection with it. Then, in her attempt to save it, it sacrificed itself in order to protect her. But she never got the chance to grieve for it, or really for anyone important to her. She never got to grieve for her parents or for the Chozo, because one happened when she was a child and couldn't understand it, while the other happened just before she would begin her first mission on Zebes and thus had to focus on the task at hand. Since then, she's not had the chance to grieve because first she had to go to SR388 then almost immediately back to Zebes. After this second Zebes trip, we finally have the chance for Samus to grieve for the Chozo, but now she also has to grieve for the baby Metroid and likely now can finally understand things to grieve for her parents. I would expect this to be when she DOES have an emotional breakdown over everything... but she didn't. She was emotional, yea, but she didn't have a breakdown about it all. In fact, the only time she had anything close to a break down following Super Metroid's ending was when Adam walked into Sector Zero and she was screaming at him to not go. You can see her breaking down there, because once again she's watching someone important to her about to die. She saw her parents die, she saw the Chozo die, she saw the baby Metroid die, she thought she saw Anthony die and now she's watching Adam die.

Sorry, I got a bit off track. The point of this is, she shouldn't be cold and uncaring. She NEEDS to have an emotional side, to be able to connect to normal people and make her a more immersive character. I think the only problem is they had her break down at the wrong spot. She shouldn't have broken down for Adam. She should've did it beforehand, with an altered story, so that when she broke down AGAIN when Adam sacrificed himself, it would likely feel more real to us.

In short, I don't think Sakamoto is wrong to give her emotions. I think he's wrong in how he did it, and I hope he'll go back to the drawing board on it to figure out how to do Samus right.

~VinceThePhilosopher Jun 8, 2013
When I say cold, I don't mean to the point where she doesn't care. I'm not talking about facking Sqaull levels of apathy here. I mean to the point where we understand that her behavior is the result of what happened to her in the past. Watching her as she gradually opens up to her teammates shows that there's more to her then it seems.

We're going by the timeline of the games alone, mainly because that's how the mainstream audience will know Samus. I spoke ill about the manga, but I'll admit there are a number of elements and pieces that I enjoyed from it. To be honest, I was just speaking out of the moment when I mentioned it. Regardless, a good storyteller can make the a story seem seamless.

What I mean is, if Other M were written properly, one wouldn't HAVE to know about Samus' to know why she's the way she is to be drawn into what's happening.

On that note, we have the Ridley scene. The scene where Samus has a nervous breakdown when recalling the death of her parents... before I get into that (and really, how did we discuss the story this long without bringing it up?) I want to know what you thought about it.

*hythrain Jun 9, 2013   Writer
I more or less covered the Ridley scene in the article. I'll cover it again, but I wanna address the rest of the post first...

That's a very subjective thing. Even if it were written properly, you're going to have a LOT of stupid people who won't understand. Sadly, stupid humans are a common thing...

I think I said it before, but I want to reiterate: one of my favourite moments in the manga was when Samus met Ridley as a child. Not even because of what it does for Samus, but what it does for Ridley.

[link]

Granted, I don't know how well this is translated from the original Japanese, but that look on Ridley's face in the fifth panel... THAT LOOK! You can tell there's more to Ridley there, and that interested me.

Anyway, since your sentence confused me a bit, I want to clarify... timeline of the games? You mean the canonical order or the release order?

Sadly, Other M's story also made it hard for her to open for other reasons, aka the Deleter. In fact, I think that was WHY they put the Deleter in: so she couldn't open up to the other squadron members and risk exposing weakness... wait a minute... NO... WHY DID I NOT THINK OF THIS BEFORE?!

You're going to hate me for this... but I figured it out now. Why Adam was such a dick to Samus, why he shot her in the back... it has to do with the fact that his name was on the report that led to the creation of the Bottle Ship program. They did a lot to hint the idea that maybe he was the Deleter. If he had been responsible for the report that led to the BS program, it could stand to reason he knew what secrets laid here and he was here to get those secrets... however, since he was deployed as a regular squadron, he had to deal with his fellow squadron mates. Then Samus showed up and made things more complicated for him.

The idea of her being shot in the back was to suggest the Deleter shot her, but she knew it was Adam, which suggested he might've been the Deleter and... this changes so much... the hell run wasn't because he was just being a dick for her leaving or she was trying to test herself... it was another part of the whole scheme to suggest he was the Deleter, he used the hell run to try and off her, and when she wouldn't die he had to give up the scheme and ordered the varia suit. I don't know how I didn't think of this before. It even explains all the inconsistencies of his actions to how Samus described him. It was meant to continue the charade until the very end.

Now granted, this doesn't change a lot of things, but... maybe this is why Adam was written as he was?

Okay, I'm gonna return to Ridley now.

So, regarding Ridley, there are a few things to consider:

1. The canonical timeline.
2. The circumstances in how Samus encounters Ridley in each game
3. The circumstances that lead Ridley to be alive again in Other M.

Let's start with the timeline. The games are, in canonical order...

Manga
Zero Mission
Prime 1, 2, then 3
Metroid 2 (BTW, this does contradict something I said earlier. My apologies. I misspoke when talking about Samus grieving)
Super Metroid
Other M
Fusion

Samus' trauma regarding Ridley occurs during the manga, where she tries to befriend Ridley. He looks like he'll show compassion, then openly threatens her. He then kills her mother, he's already killed her father, and Samus somehow survives (Also, Ridley ate her parents and there's a good chance she saw this). The next time she encounters Ridley, in the manga, she undergoes symptoms of PTSD due to her childhood. However, when she encounters Ridley for the third time, it's when she fights in Zero Mission and supposedly kills him. What changed? She had time to cope and prepare herself. She knew she'd face Ridley and could avenge her parents. She adjusted to it.

But this doesn't mean she can't suffer from PTSD again. People who suffer from PTSD have it as an ongoing battle. I know this because I have an uncle who suffers from it after serving in the military and was a P.O.W. back in the 90s.

So let's fast forward to the next game, Metroid Prime 1. She boards a Space Pirate ship and finds Ridley there, alive and being rebuilt. It's entirely possible she had a trigger of PTSD here, but it didn't have an impact. Why? Ridley ran. She didn't fight him here. He ran, which once again gave her time to prepare her mind. The time came, she fought, but she didn't see him die. She saw him fall, but not die. To an extent, she knows he's could be alive. She also technically knows he can heal his body by consuming flesh.

He's not seen again until Metroid Prime 3, where there are two encounters with him. Everything here goes rather fast, and before you know it both Ridley (Who is looking more healed than he did in Prime 1. Yea, he was eating flesh) and Samus are falling. This leads to a rather intense surge of adrenaline for Samus, which lets her overcome her PTSD. Alternatively, she KNEW Ridley survived in MP1 and knew he'd likely show up if the Space Pirates were involved, thus had mentally prepared herself again. This is also why she can handle him later, and this time she thinks she kills him.

Now we skip to Super Metroid. Ridley suddenly appears, but Samus can't do shit to him. He escapes with the baby Metroid, not fighting. Why couldn't she do anything? Well, if Super Metroid were made today, the answer is obvious. PTSD. She had another episode and was incapable of fighting back. She managed to break through that, again, long enough to escape. Her journey through Zebes gave her time to mentally prepare once again, and once again she thinks she's killed him. In fact, this time she knows she has because the planet blows up and anything on it is destroyed.

Finally, we hit Other M. This is the first time in the entire series where Samus is NOT prepared for Ridley when she has to fight him. In fact, I'm going to go as far as saying adrenaline got her moving again here when Anthony was going to die, much like how adrenaline got her moving in the first MP3 encounter. This is why she freezes up, though. She's think he's dead, so naturally she's not prepared mentally for him and thus suffers a PTSD episode. Adrenaline breaks her out of it, allowing her to fight back. She's always had the time to prepare or had something immediately force her into the situation, thus why the circumstances of how they meet matters. Except for Other M, she's always encountered him at least once before fighting him, meaning she has that time she needs to be ready. And as I said, this is a time when Samus is absolutely, 100% certain Ridley is dead. She didn't expect him alive in Metroid Prime 1, but she had the mental time, remember? It's completely out of left field that he's alive.

In Fusion, she saw Ridley's remains (which are likely from the Bottle Ship) frozen, and then saw an X parasite leave it. She knew an X-Parasite Ridley would come, thus prepared.

In short, I like the scene as how it lets players experience what she likely has gone through several times.

~VinceThePhilosopher Jun 9, 2013
I kind of interpreted his expression as pure pity; like he was looking down at a stupid animal who didn't know it was about to be put down.

Meh.... I think you're giving Sakamoto a bit to much credit. See, that would actually make sense. That would mean that the entire Deleter subplot have a setup and payoff, like a story is suppose to have. The problem with that is, it might actually make the story slightly compelling and clearly that wasn't what Sakamoto had in mind.


All joking aside, with with subject of the story being presented in such a heavy-handed manner, I doubt Sakamoto would've been smart enough to have ONE element in the story presented in subtly. And even if that was intended direction of the Deleter subplot, that unintentionally highlights how idiotic Samus is in this game. Not once after everything is said in done, does Samus think into who could've been the true Deleter. In truth, I prefer the implication that James was a culprit.

As for the Ridley scene... well, I think you already know that I didn't like it based on my current standpoint. However, I'll take into consideration what you said about Samus being ill prepared and run on it, because as much as I don't like it, the idea actually has merit. Here are the problems I have with the scene:

1. Despite the game going out of it's way to make sure than newcomers are up to speed with the past events of the Metroid series, they don't give any context for them to who Ridley is and why he of all things is what causes Samus to panic. I can't even begin to tell you how many first timers where confused to what was happening when that scene was first shown. This was one of the very few times in the game where exposition or a flashback would've been nessicary. It's actually self-contradictory, because while Sakamoto spent most of his time over explaining everything in the concern that we wouldn't get what's happening, he just expects us to just KNOW who Ridley is. Granted, I don't know what kind of drooling dolt would claim to be a Metroid fan and NOT know who Ridley is, but you get my point.

2. Samus is at the time, aware that the foes before her are clones of all the creatures she killed. With that knowledge, you'd think she'd have the foresight as a trained bounty hunter to assume Ridley would be amongst them.

3. Having Ridley in the game was unnecessary and added nothing (save for an admittedly kickass boss fight). Considering the plot of the game and the general focus was on how Samus Aran was trying to make up for what she sees as mistake she made, we're naturally given context to both how she viewed situations in the past and present. At no point in the entire game do we get context to what happened to her as a child. As such, his appearance in the game comes straight out of nowhere from a storytelling viewpoint. Right after the scene, it's dropped and the story moves right back along with the direction it was heading. Take him out of the game, you don't change anything of importance. What, that ONE part where Anthony is presumed dead? The Deleter blindsided him. There, fixed.

*hythrain Jun 9, 2013   Writer
It's hard to tell what the intent of that look was. Simply because I'd like to believe there's more to Ridley than mindless killing, I try to see it as him showing sympathy. He obviously can't let her live, it'd make him look weak in front of the troops he commands (Later on, the Space Pirates are described as being a bit mindless, where they only follow the strongest. This was Ridley before Mother Brain).

It's hard to say. I do feel like that scene between Anthony and Samus, when both were going to the geothermal plant, was also meant to help push the idea. She also did consider it a possibility, but she immediately threw it out because "it's Adam." In fact, we can already tell she doesn't consider it, AT ALL, to be Adam or Anthony. Perhaps this was also intentional. I think it's worth noting, Samus lost contact with Adam whenever she was dealing with the Deleter in some way (Like when she chased him through Sector One which led to her meeting MB and learning about Sector Zero). There's a huge amount of potential that he might've been doing this and was, in fact, using the very heavy-handed design of the rest of the story to mask this idea.

You're right that it would highlight Samus as being an idiot, since she never thought to consider Adam was against her, and perhaps that's why. Samus is human. Humans can make mistakes. If the idea is what Sakamoto intended, he was trying to make her look more human by having her trust Adam. It brings up its own problems, but we won't get into that. We know they're there.

This was, indeed, the one scene that needed some backstory. It would've been nice if she had spoken of Ridley or something during the game, since it would've added context for this scene. For a game that told us backstory from Super Metroid, it was weird this one didn't explain Ridley. However, I don't believe there's any reason for Samus to believe Ridley would've been cloned: Not all the Space Pirates would've been on Zebes. They're a huge group, with huge numbers. They have an entire homeworld, which we went to in MP3. Chances are a large number of them still existed there. Sure, some monsters were cloned too, but we didn't deal with other big bosses. Where was Kraid? Where was Spore Spawn or Crocomire or Botwoon or Draygon? None of the bosses returned. Sure, some enemies references some of them (Like the Desbrachians in Other M referencing the same fight style as Crocomire, or the Fune and Namihe also being giant worms while Botwoon was a serpent), but they weren't present. This means not everything was cloned. This also means it's likely Ridley wasn't.

Ridley being in the game was for two things: fans love fighting Ridley, and because there needed to be an origin for the Ridley carcass in Fusion. Where did it come from? They didn't get that from Zebes, no way. So having him in Other M lets them explain it.

~VinceThePhilosopher Jun 9, 2013
Do you know how much it hurts me too look at the female cast of Super Smash Brothers and bare in mind that Princess Peach is more able minded than Samus? Thanks Sakamoto. By attempting to humanize a character, you make her competence in other games come into question.

The one thing I liked about Ridley to begin with was the fact that he was more than people assumed he would be. He looked like a mindless monster, but it's made very clear that operations of the Space Pirates are headed by Ridley. Granted, we don't see him actually commanding them but they don't harp on it enough to make us question it.

One of my favorite moments in Zero Mission is when we see Ridley arriving on the planet. Seeing him perched on the ship in like a beast while having a look of focus on his face told us more about his mindset than any exposition could have.

Well, they should've had his presence actually effect the plot. I can imagine him being the cause of the incident. Drop the parts where we see him as he evolves and have him in his normal form. Maybe once he was among the cloned creatures, he induced panic with the help of the clone Space Pirates, maybe because he's discovered the weaponized metroids and wants to take them for his own gain. Also, how could a clone completely maintain it's previous memories?

You know, for game that wants to stand on its own, they sure love to abuse the nostalgia factor.

To nitpick, I don't care for the redesign of Ridley either. A bit too muscle bound and his beak looks... well, it's kind of silly looking.

*hythrain Jun 9, 2013   Writer
Eh, I dunno, Peach is quite the dumbass. How many times has she been kidnapped? If she's not a dumbass, then she suffers from Stockholm syndrome. Why else would she let Bowser keep kidnapping her? She never tries to build better security. What's she gonna do if Bowser ever gets wise and decides to target Mario instead of her?

Ridley's always had more character to him than we expected. It's why they keep using him. He's not a mindless monster (thankfully), but I'd like to believe he's at least CAPABLE of compassion and simply chooses not to be.

I thought he was the cause, though. His roaring in that small state was what riled all the cloned creatures into wrecking the place. That's already in there. I also think it's very possible to keep with the idea that he wanted the Metroids, even in his small state, if we keep the idea of his keeping his memories (Which I'll cover in a moment). However, I think the evolution thing was needed. If he was Ridley from the beginning, that would be in the computer logs. Adam would find out and inform Samus, and Samus would've been given her time to mentally prepare. I think letting her undergo that episode of PTSD was needed, because it's something we've not seen in the games yet, and the fact that it led to someone supposedly dying makes it an even bigger deal (Also, if he had his full form and wanted the Metroids, he would've had them long before any else showed up. That attack in the lab likely happened a few days before anyone else came along, which would've given Ridley ample time to find them, capture them and leave)

As for his memories... well, while we can't be certain he had his memories, it was clear at points that he targeted Samus like he knew her while in his various stages (We could claim his actions when he was in his normal form was him simply being malicious). If he did have his memories, I'd say it's likely that whatever process they used to clone him worked a little too well, which was why he came out as the puff ball. This was actually what he was born as, and eventually he became Ridley. The cloning process did so well at cloning him, it actually came out with his small form. It also managed to copy his memories of Samus specifically, which were ingrained into every cell of him to show his utter rage towards her.

~VinceThePhilosopher Jun 9, 2013
Yeah, well at least Peach doesn't hesitate to try and help. One of the reasons I like Zidane over Squall is because one actually tries to remain optimistic in the face of danger.

You see someone like Other M Samus and her thought process us stuck on one mood: brooding, at least until the very end of the game where she jabs Anthony playfully on the shoulder.

I have no problem believing that Ridley came out whole and the federation assumed they could contain him. The fact that the federation, after seeing the Space Pirates screw themselves over time and time again by trying to control metroids, would be so stupid to think they could do the same with better results, shows me that they're no limit to their outright stupidity.

"THE GOVERNMENT IS SECRETLY EVIL! CLEVER RIGHT?!" No.

*hythrain Jun 9, 2013   Writer
I'd say it's more than a small group are idiots. Adam's squadron had orders from the head of the Federation, meaning they had authority over any other orders (Thus how they took Madeline away from that guy known only as "the Colonel", who I think was a part of the project). It's meant to suggest there's various smaller groups working within the Federation. But honestly, screw that particular plotline.

Peach helps? When? And somehow managing to get items occasionally to Mario doesn't count.  If she really wanted to help, she'd be trying to prevent the situation altogether.

~VinceThePhilosopher Jun 10, 2013
Super Mario 2, Mario RPG, Paper Mario, Bowser's Inside Story, Super Paper Mario.

And that comes down to what I was talking about earlier. If Samus was has always been the way she's portrayed in Other M, it's impossible to get immersed in whats happening because I can't relate to who she is.

I understand PTSD is something that happens in real life and there are many people in this world who have the same type of mindset as Samus in Other M. But that's only part of what goes through the human mind. Adding natural flaws to a character isn't enough to humanize a character. If someone where to tell me about what kind of character Samus would be given in this game, I would've assumed that at some point she'd overcome her faults at some point in the story. I don't mean in the sense of, "okay, I've got enough inner strength to go beat up the bad guy!".

I would've hoped that at some point, she would've finally understood that the crisis at hand was more important then trying to "redeem" herself. To actually see Samus push her feelings aside for the sake of the mission would show that she has SOME level of inner strength (that doesn't come from Adam).

I also find it funny that despite Samus claiming to have learned from Adam's actions, she hasn't picked up his ability to not let emotions cloud good judgement. Like I said, I don't like how Adam was done in the game, but at the very least he could maintain a professional attitude.

*hythrain Jun 10, 2013   Writer
I'ma just link this in regards to Mario 2: [link]

I didn't know about Paper Mario and Bowser's Inside Story, and for some reason I spaced on Super Paper Mario. Mario RPG was about it, though I feel more like her helping was her trying to make up for the fact that Mario had to rescue her TWICE in that game. ANYWAY.

Sadly, PTSD isn't something you can "redeem" on. The best you can do is be prepared and avoid having an episode. It's also certainly not a fault you can overcome in a short time. The fact that Samus still can suffer from it, even though it's likely been a few years since she first fought Ridley in Zero Mission, shows how it can be a lifelong effect. More could be done to humanize her, sure, but it sounds like you treat PTSD like it in no way humanizes her or makes her a more legitimate character in any form.

She eventually did, but it took her a long time to even realize how important the mission was. Until she learned about the Metroids, there was no reason to think this mission was to important. That moment changed everything. That's the thing about "sake of the mission." You need to know what's really at stake to do that. She found out so late in the game, though, while Adam knew all along.

I'm trying to recall when she let her emotions cloud good judgement. Perhaps her rushing off to stop the Metroids, but I think it was good judgement on her part to try and stop them. When she dealt with Ridley? PTSD and emotions are totally different things if you mean this.

~VinceThePhilosopher Jun 10, 2013
You're still viewing this purely on the cinematic parts. I view it on as a game, since that's the title it carries. I play a game to feel a general sense of empowerment.

While most people complain about Samus constantly losing her powers game after game, I understand from a gameplay perspective why it happens. Losing your strength signifies a fall in power and it makes the player determined to fight through whatever stands against them and get that power back. Upon getting your powers back, you feel secure and finding more powers that you originally had makes gives you the sense that you've fought against the odds and are stronger because of it.

That being said, it's still annoying as piss to lose all your weapons at the beginning of the game... I said I understand it, that doesn't mean I like it.

What it all comes down to is this: when I pay for a metroid game, I expect it to BE a metroid game. No matter how much Team Ninja tries, all the flipping and kicking doesn't push the weakness of the character out of my mind. I don't feel like I'm accomplishing anything. I don't feel empowered.

And on that note I'll say this: I don't WANT this Samus. I don't WANT this story. At this point in time, I don't WANT another story driven Metroid game. You could hand me an essay detailing on how the depiction of Samus was deep and complex, but the bottom line is I don't care. This, this game, this story is worthless to me.

Don't think I haven't thought about what we've talked about. You've managed to convince me that the story isn't quite as bad as people say, and you brought up points that legitimately had me thinking. But really, it comes down to a matter of preference at this point. I prefer my own interpretation of Samus, back when her character was left to interpretation. I'll never change my mind on that.

For what it's worth, I actually enjoyed this discussion.

*hythrain Jun 10, 2013   Writer
And that's, honestly, what I wanted out of this. I don't want to change people's minds, but I just want them to think deeper. There's a reason why my review of Mega Man X4, a game that is so widely liked, was all about me being pissy with the game. I think it was a terrible story, a trend which continued for the next four Mega Man X games. If people want to love the game still, I'm fine with that, so long as at the end of reading my review they can look at the game, consider my thoughts, and just think "I still love you, but he made some valid points."

For me, I always look at the story on a separate level. For me, I can get past clunky controls in a game if the story is excellent (Once the controls get past a certain point, it becomes harder to justify. This is why I've not played Parasite Eve 2. The controls frustrated me SO MUCH in the first few minutes of play). However, I can't forgive a game with superb gameplay if the story is subpar, unless it's a game that, by design, isn't suppose to have a strong story (Katamari Damacy and original Mega Man games come to mind). Because of this, I do view stories on a separate level than gameplay. It's how I'm always going to treat video games, because for me the story is what matters the most. I play video games for a good story (Which will last for much longer than a movie or book would and allow me to be interactive, which draws me a bit more to the game to pay closer attention to the story). Even now, as I'm playing through Parasite Eve for my review of that, I'm not considering the gameplay aspects as I write my review. Mind you, because I'm playing the game directly instead of relying on memory (I've played Other M rather recently, while it's been years since I pulled out Parasite Eve), so I'm bound to include a LOT more detail as a result, but it's not exactly gameplay influence.

I have to thank you for the discussion too. There are actually some aspects I had never really looked at. I had completely missed the way the relationship between Samus and Adam was done. I was so focused on the supposed sexist aspects that I didn't even notice how Samus was idolizing Adam while he was just being a prick. I may have to do some touch-ups to this review (Or at least, do them if I ever plan to convert this into a video review)

~VinceThePhilosopher Jun 11, 2013
On an unrelated sidenote, mind if post this discussion on my blog? I think would be an interesting read for other people.

*hythrain Jun 11, 2013   Writer
I don't mind, but I think it should be edited to be only the relevant parts (Like cutting out stuff about unrelated games) instead of copied as is, since we had a lot of unrelated discussion in between it all.




Read the article here: http://hythrain.deviantart.com/art/Story-Mode-Metroid-Other-M-349589757